(Tommy and Merton are playing a video game)

Merton Dingle: Rookie mistake, Tommy. Once you get past the stick fighters, you have to shoot the orange barrels to get more ammo. Oh, now you're down to your last man.

Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: Here it comes. Whenever I get angry, hurt, excited, afraid, jealous, I start to wolf out. Sometimes it's most frustrating thing you could ever imagine.

(Tommy starts wolfing out)

Merton Dingle: Oh, yeah! I got the flamethrower! Now you're toast!

(Merton looks to Tommy, who scares him as a wolf. Tommy falls backwards onto the floor.)

Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: Other times it's not so bad.

Tommy Dawkins: Oh, yeah! The winner, and still champion, Tommy Dawkins, ladies and gentlemen! (He gets up and celebrates.)

Merton Dingle: I hate it when you do that!


(Dawkins' residence. Sally and Bob are being filmed in the living room where Dean is in his armchair)

Sally Dawkins: This is Sally Dawkins with a Good Morning Pleasantville special debate. Our topic today: The future of Main Street's Rialto Theater. To some, a landmark. To others, an eyesore. With me live in his very tastefully decorated home is mayor Bob Dawkins, and media analyst Dean Dawkins.

Dean Dawkins: Mommy.

Sally Dawkins: Mayor Bob.

Bob Dawkins: The Rialto is more than just a landmark, it is a vestige. The last vestige of a simpler time in our town. If the Rialto goes, so goes our history, so goes our soul.

Dean Dawkins: And I say to you, Mr. Mayor, tear down that Rialto! Let us dig up Main streets, that we may lay down the life-giving television cable that can entertain, educate, and enrich us all. And in the comfort of our very own bathrobes and underwear.

Tommy Dawkins: (Walking over.) Yeah, the Rialto doesn't even have cup holders in the seats. What up with that, huh? Go Angry Badgers, wooooo!

Bob Dawkins: Tommy, we are in the middle of an important television broadcast! Please try to act like an adult.

Sally Dawkins: Oh, honey, I cut the crusts off your PB&J. Have a good day at school. Mommy loves you! Ahem. Your rebuttal, Bob?

(School. Merton is being pulled apart by the arms by TNT in the locker hallway.)

Merton Dingle: Okay, guys. Okay, it's a little early. I'm serious! Oh, ah yeah, that's... Okay, thanks guys, that's starting to sting a little.

Travis: Make a wish, Tim.

Tim: I wish...

Travis: No! You're not supposed to say it out loud!

Merton Dingle: Coincidentally, I have a wish. Anyone wanna hear it? Heh, heh. Um...

(Tommy spies them from around the corner and wolfs out.)

Merton Dingle: Um, can I interest you guys in some life insurance? 'Cuz you're gonna need it about two seconds!

Tim: Trav, what does he mean?

(Travis points to Tommy wolfed out, traveling towards them)

Tommy Dawkins: Lunch time!

(Tommy grabs TNT and throws them in a pile against some lockers)

Merton Dingle: Ha ha! That's what I'm talking about!

(Tommy walks up back to normal)

Tommy Dawkins: Tim? Travis? You all right?

Tim: No, the wolf man...

Travis: He got us again! You saw him, Dingle?

Merton Dingle: There was no wolf man. You fell prey to Dr. Dingle's fists of fury!

(Hugo walks behind Merton from his office)

Hugo: I do enjoy the interrogation process, but nothing beats a confession. It's detention for you, Dingle! The charge: Bullying two captains.

Tommy Dawkins: Yeah, Merton! I mean, you oughta be ashamed of yourself, picking on poor, helpless Tim and Travis.

Hugo: Well said, Dawkins.

Tommy Dawkins: Thanks.

Hugo: (Sniffing.) Is that wacky fruit yummy bubble? (Tommy swallows his gum.) I'm cracking down on gum chewers. You've got detention, too.

Tommy Dawkins: What?

Hugo: See you both after school.

Merton Dingle: (Fist pumps.) Yeah!

Hugo: (To TNT.) Sorry, boys. I'll try harder to make these hallways a safe haven for all.

(Cafeteria. Tommy sits down next to Stacey.)

Stacey Hanson: Hey, Tommy. You wanna sign my Rialto petition?

Tommy Dawkins: Oh, right on! It's about time they blow up that old theater. Now they can put in a giant multiplexer with soft cushion seats and cupholders, and fat video games in the lobby!

Stacey Hanson: Tommy, the petition is to save the Rialto.

Tommy Dawkins: Oh, yeah, right, save... well that's a worthy cause, too. What the heck? (Signs the petition.)

Stacey Hanson: Thanks. Hey, you wanna hang out at The Factory after school?

Tommy Dawkins: Yeah, yeah, that'd be great.

Stacey Hanson: Good.

Tommy Dawkins: Wait! No, I can't. I just remembered I've got...

(Detention room)

Hugo: Detention is the cornerstone upon which the cathedral of discipline is built. When I was growing up, we learned right from wrong the old-fashioned way: Through outdated instructional films.

(He turns on a film projector and an old black-and-white film starts entitled "Today's Teens" by Los Alamos Films. Tommy and Merton watch. The film shows a school hallway.)

Narrator: Meet Butch. Butch is a bad apple. He's only happy when he's making others unhappy.

Boy: Oh, hey, Butch.

(Butch sticks his leg out and trips the boy who falls over)

Butch: Have a nice trip, Bucko? Ha ha ha!

Narrator: Nobody likes a bully.

Merton Dingle: Oh, look at...

(The film shows Butch sliding behind Mary who is at her locker)

Butch: Say, Mary, it looks like we're all alone. What do you say you let me plant one on you? Just a smoocharoo?

Narrator: In this day and age the exchange of precious bodily fluids is always risky.

(Hugo has fallen asleep in his chair. Tommy whispers to Merton.)

Tommy Dawkins: Psst! Come on, let's get out of here!

Merton Dingle: Wait, I wanna see what happens to Butch. He's the classic antihero of the post-war era, in the Brando tradition.

Narrator: Remember, you never know who's been on the inside.

Tommy Dawkins: Come on!

(Tommy and Merton get up to leave)

Narrator: And furthermore, Butch should know better. when dealing with a swell gal like Mary, there are do's and there are dont's.

(Mary slaps Butch)

Mary: Butch, I am not that type of girl

Butch: Ah, this movie's lousy with rules! Don't smoke, don't go to second base! Well, I'm going out there. I can find a baby soon who ain't no prude.

Mary: Wait! You can't go out there!

(Butch comes out of the screen and into the detention room)

Mary: Butch! Where are you going?

Narrator: Where do you think you're going, young man?

(Butch swaggers toward the door, but turns around, sticks his pinkies in his mouth, then puts them in Hugo's ears.)

Hugo: (Still asleep.) Kiss me again, Mother.

Butch: "Mother"?!

Mary: Butch! You come back here!

Butch: Yeah, don't worry about it, doll face. I'll be back and I'll be bringing a friend. (Walks out door.)

Mary: Butch!

(High school cafeteria. Butch is pushing people out of the serving line.)

Butch: Coming through! Advanced grade!

(He gets served a hamburger on a plate with chips)

Butch: What gives? My hamburger looks all screwy.

Girl: (Next to Butch.) It's a veggie burger.

Butch: Vegetables in a burger? What, has this school gone pinko? (Picks up juice container.) What's it's in the box, toots?

Girl: (Reads label on it.) Cran-grape. Duh!

Butch: Oh, you've got Moxie, kiddo! Too bad you're not a couple of years older.

Girl: Yeah, whatever, Fonzie. Come on, Heidi, let's go. (Walks away.)

(Butch puts his meal tray on the table between TNT. Tim has a neckbrace and Travis has an arm sling. They both have various bandages and plasters on them.)

Butch: Sorry, boys. Looks like you're in my seat.

Travis: You clearly, clearly, have no clue who we are, do you?

Tim: I think we should give him a warning head start. What do you think?

Travis: I agree. Okay, we'll give you five seconds to run before we pommel you!

Butch: (Counts quickly on his fingers.) One, two, three, four, five. I'm still here. What are you gonna do about it, Wisenheimer?

(TNT push their meal trays away)

Travis: Oh, well someone wants to tango!

Tim: Hit it, maestro!

Butch: Let's dance!

(Butch pushes TNT's heads down on the table, stunning them. He then pulls them backwards so they fall on the floor. He then sits down behind his meal tray.)

Tim: You sure I'm still [aroom?]?

Travis: Yes, Tim, I'm positive.

(Later, Butch breaks into Stacey's locker. Stacey comes and talks to someone off-camera.)

Stacey Hanson: Thanks for the signatures, guys.

(She sees and goes up to Butch)

Stacey Hanson: Hi!

Butch: Hey.

Stacey Hanson: Hey, do, um, do you want to sign my petition to save the Rialto?

Butch: Rialto? What's the Rialto?

(In the background, Merton and Tommy pass by. Merton sees Butch and does a double take.)

Stacey Hanson: It's a little theatre they're demolishing downtown.

Tommy Dawkins: Who is that? and what's up with the oil spill in his hair?

Butch: So what are you, sweet on all theatres? Yeah? [...]

(Butch signs the petition)

Merton Dingle: He looks kind of familiar, doesn't he?

Tommy Dawkins: Yeah, yeah. Where do we know that guy from?

Stacey Hanson: (Taking signed petition from Butch.) Thanks.

Butch: No problem, baby doll.

(A boy comes walking past and Butch trips him over with his foot)

Butch: Uh! You have a nice trip, bucko?

(Merton and Tommy recognize him.)

Merton Dingle and Tommy Dawkins: (Looking at each other.) Butch!!

(Merton's lair. Merton is writing on a blackboard while Tommy is watching.)

Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: Merton tried to explain to me how it was possible for Butch to jump out of the movie screen and into reality. I didn't understand a word of it, but then again, neither did he.

Merton Dingle: You know, if we can maintain a constant level of emulsion. Ah, you know, and there will be a, you know, celluloid and protons would converge in, in a, in a, diverge.

Tommy Dawkins: What?

Merton Dingle: I, I don't know where I am right now. I'm, I'm, this, I'm lost. I don't know how Butch got into the movie, out of the movie! But I do know this: This is just like the Purple Rose Cairo Woody Allen's Oscar-nominated tale of longing and betrayal.

Tommy Dawkins: Yeah? What happened?

Merton Dingle: Ah, the Academy snubbed him. It's all so political.

Tommy Dawkins: What happened in the movie?

Merton Dingle: A screen character stepped out of a film into the real world, just like Bush did. (Hearing and looking at the TV.) Hey, your mom's on!

Sally Dawkins: So, unless the injunction is lifted, nothing can spare our beloved Rialto Theater from the wrecking ball. And if mayor Bob Dawkins is watching, it's not your fault, honey! Anyhow, back...

Merton Dingle: We've never really talked about this, but your mom is kinda...

Tommy Dawkins: The next word that comes out of your mouth better be "talented".

Merton Dingle: Talented! Yes, exactly! I mean, and you don't often see that in smaller TV markets.

Tommy Dawkins: Well, we know Butch is here. That we do know. Hey, what if we, like, I don't know, like, like, check the film for clues, or something like that?

Merton Dingle: Heh, yeah, good idea, Columbo! Yeah, let's "check the film for clues"! Actually, that's not a bad idea!

(Detention room. Merton is checking the bookcase while Tommy is talking to Mary on screen.)

Mary: Well, have you found him yet?

Tommy Dawkins: Who, Butch?

Mary: No, President Eisenhower. Of course Butch!

Narrator: Now, Mary, we're all upset. You shouldn't take it out on them.

Merton Dingle: Um, guys, I think the important thing to remember here is that Butch is here terrorizing us, instead of there terrorizing you.

Narrator: The pale, young man is right.

Merton Dingle: (To Tommy.) How does he know I'm... Young?

Mary: We've got to get Butch back into this movie where he belongs!

Tommy Dawkins: What's he doing here in the first place?

Mary: He says he's gone to find a girl to bring back into the film with him.

Tommy Dawkins: You mean a girl from our school?

Narrator: I'm afraid so.

Merton Dingle: Who would Butch go for?

Tommy Dawkins: Take a wild guess.

Merton Dingle: Heather Scarpazzo? I mean, I know she's got abnormally thick ankles, but if the graffiti and the boys' room is right, she's an amorous, little lass!

Tommy Dawkins: No, Merton. Stacey!

(The Factory. Stacey and Butch are drinking milkshakes through straws. Butch is blowing bubbles into his through his straw.)

Butch: Say, you got some set of pearly whites! You ever thought about being in pictures? (Stacey smiles with embarassment.) Huh?

(Later, Stacey and Butch are dancing)

Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: For those of you that weren't born in the fifties, that's called the twist.

(Everyone looks at them dancing. After the music stops, they applaud. They go back to their table.)

Butch: Another malted?

Stacey Hanson: I would love to, but I have to get ten more signatures on this petition.

Butch: Here, let me see it.

(Butch takes the petition and forges ten signatures)

Butch: Vanilla or chocolate?

Stacey Hanson: Um...

Butch: Chocolate!

(Butch goes to get the drinks. Tommy is looking from afar.)

Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: The twist? A malted? I gotta send this guy back to where he belongs!

(Now Stacey and Butch are drinking through straws from the same cup)

Butch: Say, I've got an idea. Why don't we continue this over at the Rialto? I have a very special movie I wanna show you.

Stacey Hanson: Slow down, Butch. I barely even know you.

Butch: Well, here's all you need to know: I'm a perfect gentleman. (Kisses her hand. Tommy's eyes turn yellow.)

Stacey Hanson: Okay!

Butch: Great! Well, I'll go pick up the movie. I'll meet you there at eight o'clock.

Stacey Hanson: (Writing a memo on her palm.) Rialto... Eight it is.

Butch: All right! (Gets up.) So I'll see you there.

Stacey Hanson: Bye.

(Butch walks away. Tommy sits down where Butch was sitting.)

Tommy Dawkins: Stacey... (Takes cup and gives it to waitress to take away.) Look, Stacey, I know this is gonna sound crazy, but you have got to stay away from that Butch guy. He's dangerous.

Stacey Hanson: Dangerous?

Tommy Dawkins: Yeah! No, seriously. I mean this guy is really, really dangerous.

Stacey Hanson: What's wrong with him?

Tommy Dawkins: Well, he wants... Well, see, he's trying to... What he's trying to do is... Butch is a character from... Okay, he's just a Purple Rose of Cairo.

Stacey Hanson: Look, Tommy, I really gotta go, okay?

Tommy Dawkins: Just promise me you'll be careful?

Stacey Hanson: All right, Dad, I promise! (Holds up hand.) Scout's honor!

(Tommy sees the memo Stacey has written on her palm: "Rialto 8:00")

(In the detention room, Butch is going through film canisters but can't find the film he wants. Merton appears at the door holding up a film canister.)

Merton Dingle: Looking for this? Heh, heh, heh!

(Butch goes up to Merton who shrinks against the wall and takes the film)

Butch: Yeah. O.S.

(Butch goes to head-butt Merton but stops before his head makes contact. Merton flinches. Butch walks away.)

Merton Dingle: (To himself.) I had to taunt!

(Merton's lair. Merton is analyzing film reel.)

Tommy Dawkins: (Entering.) Okay, they are meeting at the Rialto at eight.

Merton Dingle: (Looks at watch.) It's seven-thirty. We should be going.

Tommy Dawkins: He can't, you know, do anything without the film, right?

Merton Dingle: Uh!

Tommy Dawkins: Right?

Merton Dingle: In my defense, let me just say that he is in fact a very, very, very, very bad apple! (Tommy rushes back outside.) I should go, too.

(The Rialto. Tommy and Merton search about but find nothing.)

Merton Dingle: Well?

Tommy Dawkins: Well, what?

Merton Dingle: We're about to face a realm-hopping, time-traveling thug. It's a fairly stressful situation. (Pulls shirt to reveal neck.) See that vein? That's not supposed to pop out like that! Why haven't you transformed?!

Tommy Dawkins: I don't know. It's just not happening! I must not be afraid of Butch.

Merton Dingle: Yeah...

Tommy Dawkins: I guess I'm just gonna have to handle this as myself, as Tommy Dawkins.

Merton Dingle: Mm-hmm. (Suddenly kicks Tommy in the groin.)

Tommy Dawkins: Uh!! (Falls down and stands up wolfed-out.) Awoooo! What are you doing, man?

Merton Dingle: You know, just in case. Come on.

(They walk further around. They hear some sound and rush to hide. Butch and Stacey enter.)

Butch: (Offering his hand to Stacey to lead her down.) Here.

(Butch and Stacey walk into the room)

Butch: Okay, I'll go for the projector. You make yourself comfortable. (He leaves.)

Stacey Hanson: Comfortable! Yeah, right.

(The film starts playing)

Butch: (Walking back next to Stacey.) Mary, say hello to Stacey. She's coming to live with us.

Mary: Butch, no!

Stacey Hanson: Okay, what's going on?

Butch: I told you, I was gonna put you in pictures. I just left out the word "permanently"! (He grabs Stacey's hand)

Stacey Hanson: (Struggling with Butch's grip.) What are you doing?!

Narrator: Let her go, Butch! We'll talk about this when you get home.

Butch: Put a sock in it, square! I'm in charge of this picture now. Things are gonna be a lot different around here. There! Fasten your seatbelt, baby doll. It's gonna be a bumpy ride.

Stacey Hanson: Okay, game's over. (She pulls and throws Butch to the ground.) You are too weird!

(Stacey runs off)

Mary: Run, Stacey, run!

Butch: (Getting up.) Come back!

(Butch starts running but Tommy sticks out his wolfed-out foot and trips Butch over)

Tommy Dawkins: (Standing in front of Butch.) You have a nice trip, bucko?

(Butch looks up bewildered. Merton appears next to Tommy.)

Merton Dingle: Yeah, you have a nice trip, bucko?

Tommy Dawkins: Merton, Merton, quiet, okay?

Butch: (Stands up.) Hey, I'll go two against one, but I ain't fighting no bear!

Merton Dingle: Oh, he's not a bear! He's pure-blooded, all-American werewolf! And I'm his sidekick, his compadre, the Tonto to his Lone Ranger...

(Butch grabs Merton hostage.)

Merton Dingle: Oh! Well, I'd be happy to share any of Kemo Sabe's weak points with you.

Mary: Oh, heavens!

Narrator: Mary, your language!

Tommy Dawkins: Let him go, Butch!

Butch: Sorry, Charlie. Now back off! Or I'm pulverizing this pipsqueak!

Merton Dingle: Okay, the neck is very brittle. I didn't bring much milk as a child!

Tommy Dawkins: Butch, you get back in that movie, and you leave us alone!

Butch: No chance, chump! I only came out here because I wanted a companion to bring back. You, you gotta make things all screwy for me!

(Mary smiles and signals Tommy)

Tommy Dawkins: Come on, Butch. You don't have it so bad in your movie. There's a beautiful girl, you know.

Butch: Yeah, she's all right, but between you and me she's not a whole lot of fun, you know what I mean?

Mary: Ah, Butch, I was thinking. If you come back, I'll let you get to second base.

Butch: No fooling?

Mary: Try me! Besides, we all kind of miss you back in here.

Butch: Hot dog!

(Butch releases Merton and reenters the film)

Butch: All right, Mary, let's get cracking!

Narrator: Butch is about to learn that bad deeds don't go unpunished.

Teacher: (Walking up behind Butch.) Ahem!

Butch: What?

Teacher: You're coming with me, young man!

(Teacher grabs his ear and leads him away)

Butch: Ah! Ah! Hey, no fair! I got her approval!

(Tommy laughs)

Mary: Thanks, Tommy.

Tommy Dawkins: (No longer wolfed-out.) No problem, Mary.

(Mary writes her phone number in her notebook and holds it up to Tommy and winks at him)

Tommy Dawkins: Thanks anyway, but I, uh, I've already got a gal.

Merton Dingle: Ah, can you just flash that number one more time? (Writes Mary's number on his palm.)

(In the film Mary is walking down the locker hallway with a boy)

Narrator: Now, that looks like good, clean fun.

(Suddenly she grabs the boy and pulls him close and kisses him wildly)

Narrator: Mary! I never approved...

Mary: Oh, stuff it!

Boy: That felt nice!

(Mary pulls him back and continues kissing him)


Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: Well, Stacey's petition saved the Rialto, but before they could start renovating, mom and dad took a trip down memory lane. Oh!

(Bob and Sally are kissing in the theatre)

Tommy Dawkins Voiceover: As for Butch, well, he clearly left his mark in Pleasantville.

(In The Factory, Stacey and Tommy are sharing a milkshake)

Tommy Dawkins: Vanilla!

Stacey Hanson: Mmm! Vanilla, my favorite flavor. You wanna dance?

Tommy Dawkins: Nah, I'm, um, having problems with these new dance steps, you know?

(On the dance floor, Merton is doing the twist.)